I do not regret having my baby. Sure, I hated being pregnant and all the ugly symptoms that come with it. But I LOVE being a mum. I LOVE my little love. And I could not imagine my life without her. But I want to say to my little girl, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for bringing you into this world when there is so much ugly in it. In the last 2 weeks I’ve read articles about a man high on meth raping a 3 year old girl, a silly professor who wants pedophilia to be recognized as a sexual orientation (because that’s how some people like it), and “a swimmer” (because that’s crucial to the story) raping an unconscious woman and pretty much getting away with a slap on the wrist. So. Much. Ugly. This stuff makes my blood boil. THIS is the kind of world I’ve brought my little girl into? Gosh, I’m sorry! I’ve never been so scared about life. My almost 3-month-old daughter has to grow up around this. She has to grow up with a justice system that is out of whack and politics who are half insane. There is so much ugly in this world that I’m scared to bring more precious spirits into it. It’s when I hear stories like these that I want to run away to the middle of no where and build a house for me and my family, and never, ever, leave it. Because I don’t want my baby put in danger because of some fools. I’m sorry, my honey. I’m sorry for all of the ugly you’ll have to live in.
There is also so much beauty in this world. Just look around you. The trees, the flowers, that green green grass. The ocean. Those little shells that stab you in the feet as you walk along the beach. Japanese food and, my goodness, Whittaker’s Chocolate. So. Much. Beauty. We live in one of the most beautiful countries in the world. New Zealand is FILLED with beauty. Just look outside your front door. The mountains that are safe for us to hike, the beautiful sunset along the west coast. Lot’s of good things happening around the world. Our former Prime Minister, Helen Clark, is ranked 22 on the most powerful women list. We don’t have war in our country. And we live in a time and country where there is no racial segregation. Maori and Pakeha have their issues, but we can live on the same street happily. Heck, we can be married happily! We have freedom of speech and the right to vote. We have the freedom to worship as we choose to. We can pray and read scripture. We can be sealed in the temple. We have the internet! We have disposable nappies and I’m sure all the oldies are grateful for those now. We have a patriarch of the home who has a good job. We have a roof over our heads and always have food on the table (thankfully not cooked by me).
There is so much ugly in this world. We should never ignore nor dismiss that. It’s sad to see people defending all of that ugly. People who try to manipulate it so it’s not “ugly”. Just stand up and be responsible for your stupid actions. Don’t try to hide behind daddy and all of his money. Others can still see that ugly. I’m disgusted that my little love has to exist in this world with people like you, ruining life for people like us. You’ll be dealt with.
My lady love, I hope you can still see all the beauty in this world too. All of the goodness that exists in people. There are people like your grandparents to work super hard and spoil you rotten. There are people like my boss who are always helping the community. And there are good people in the public who will protect you if they see something ugly happening. Don’t forget to be one of those people too. Don’t forget to be a part of this beauty.